Tuesday, December 11, 2007

About our Sexual Addiction Recovery Ministry

Here is our "Introduction to L.I.F.E." video. Learn about the problem of sexual addiction and how our support group recovery ministry helps restore integrity.



For more information about starting a group at your church, please visit our main website at http://www.freedomeveryday.org/.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

A Sneek Peek at 2008

In our Fall newsletter, our Executive Director, Johna Hale tells of the New Beginning. By God's design of 7, our 8th year of ministry is the year of a New Beginning.

We have many plans for 2008 including:

  • Facilitator Training and Support
  • Further Outreach to Those Clouded in Sexual Shame
  • Continued Advancement in Resources
  • Development of New Resources
  • Planning for a Nationwide Support Network
  • and continued operations of this ministry


We wish that this could all be done for free - but it cannot!

During this giving time of year, you will receive many opporunties to make an offering - please consider all of them. When considering L.I.F.E. Ministries reflect on how our program has changed your life, the life of your spouse, and the lives of those in your church & churches across the world.

Your tax-deductible donations will be used for 2008 plans to cultivate the core of our ministry, continue extending a hand to those in darkness, and deliver more of God's children to sexual integrity.

There are two ways to give this year:


1One-time Offering

A one-time tax-deductible donation. Keep in mind, donors of $200 or more will become a L.I.F.E. partner (what's this?).


recurringMonthly Pledge

A reoccuring donation each month for one year. Keep in mind, donors of $20 or more each month will become a L.I.F.E. partner (what's this?).


Make Your Offering Here

Monday, November 19, 2007

Holiday Book Buying

With Christmas not far off L.I.F.E. Ministries realizes that although we celebrate Jesus Christ as the reason for the season, purchasing gifts for our friends, family and loved ones is still a wonderful way to show appreciation and love to one another.

Books, music and computer media are always popular and there are great places to buy these items. L.I.F.E. would like to remind everyone that these mega-book store chains and any book store for that matter, are not always the safest places for people in recovery from sexual addiction to browse.

Many of you have been very helpful in relaying the message to us here and we’d like to do our part as well. Please realize that there are safer ways to be “out and about” this holiday season. If you are planning on purchasing books and the like, consider finding the titles, topics or authors you want on the many internet sites selling them.

You can call ahead for the items your thinking about to see if they are available and have them waiting at the register with your name when you arrive. You can ask someone to go with you to these stores to help create some accountability.

And, if you must go and get the book by yourself, let someone in your group or your sponsor know before hand. When you arrive at the store, it may be wise to ask someone who works there to take you to the place where what you’re looking for is located, this might be smarter than simply “launching out” into the store to discover just how much garbage there really is.
We hope that you have a safe and wonderful holiday season!

Sincerely,
Larry G.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Facilitator Training Survey

L.I.F.E. Ministries is designing its facilitator training resources. We want to know what type of sexual addiction support group facilitator training materials you would like to see.

Help us out by taking a 21 question survey at http://freedomeveryday.org/survey/index.php?sid=1

If you participate by November 30th, you will receive 10% off a resource order as our way of saying thank you.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

New Beginnings

The Lord keeps bringing Isaiah 43:18-19 to my mind, which talks about new beginnings. We entered into the eighth year of L.I.F.E. Ministries in July 2007, and have been reminded that in the Lord’s system eight often means a new beginning. The last seven years were spent in receiving revelation, developing resources and proclaiming the vision that the Lord gave me for this ministry. That was in Israel several years ago, while at the Garden of Gethsemane; and I was kneeling at the rock with Jesus, saying “not my will but thy will be done.” Then Jesus stood up and I stood beside him, and there was a line as far as I could see with people of all nationalities lined up as an army going toward battle. The Lord later told me that the army was being formed to fight the battle of sexual addiction in the church. Of course, that subject was hardly discussed eight years ago.

We have had glimpses of this army the last seven years. One recent glimpse came at the AACC World Conference. We watched our own volunteers and realized the transformation taking place in each of their lives, as they are now serving the Lord instead of being in bondage to shame. I looked at the glow on their faces as they answered questions and served the people; and I realized again that only Jesus could bring this about and that being Jesus to each other in the support groups will continue to bring this growth into full bloom in the next few years. The statistics speak for themselves: even within the Christian community 47% say that pornography is a problem in their home. Sixty to ninety percent of Christian men and one out of three Christian women are sexually addicted. In an anonymous survey conducted by Leadership magazine, seven out of 10 lay leaders in the church admitted to visiting adult Web sites at least once a week. When pastors were asked the same question, four out of 10 said they did the same. Paul Harvey has reported that internet pornography is the fastest growing addiction in the United States, with 82 million visitors to such sites each year; and one-third of those are women. If this isn’t the biggest problem within the church today, I don’t know what is. Pastor Jack Hayford has said that if the church doesn’t address this problem then it will rob the church of its life and power. Consequently, we need to join forces and be the army that keeps that from happening. Preparing for this new season in L.I.F.E. Ministries will involve building and embracing that vision, by reaching out to the people who are called to be a part of this army. How do we do this?

In order to help the large numbers of Christians struggling with sexual addiction; we need to realize more financial support from the groups to be able to enlarge the ministry, do more training, and develop additional resources to provide a close-knit community to support and reinforce the army with skill and love. To start, we are going to send to a survey to some of our largest groups, asking them to identify their needs. We’ll also have these same questions available on our website for all to answer. We will use these answers to set our priorities and address the needs of the recovery community. Also, starting in February, we are going to have a monthly training for the spouses’ and men’s group facilitators, but all can join in this web based training. And we continue to pray for the finances to have an annual L.I.F.E. Ministries conference where we can all get together for further training and to build community. These are just a few of the things that we hope will build and equip the army, and the surveys should tell our headquarters team where we need to put additional efforts as well.

In this eighth year of new beginning, let’s always remember that love will continue to be the greatest key for the church the next 7 years. Let the L.I.F.E. groups demonstrate this love of Jesus to all those in attendance, and to all in the church. I remember that I had to leave the church for several years because of the shame of my own sexual addiction—it wasn’t’ a safe place. Let our groups and our churches be that safe place for all who need this love, because without love we are nothing and whatever we accomplish without it profits nothing (l Cor.13). Let us grow and mature in love as we seek the Lord’s purposes for our lives. Ask God for a vision of how you can minister out of the healing that He is providing for you. Even within Christ’s Church, this cancer is destroying lives and families; and keeping people from their God-given purposes. We pray that you will be a part of this army; fully engaged in this battle to encourage, empower and equip God’s people to live everyday in sexual integrity—to the Glory of the Lord.

We love you,
Johna

The Orientation Guide for Men - The Beginning Journey

Greetings,

Our endeavor to equip and provide tools and resources that are focused on rising up compassionate, powerful and effective Group Facilitators brings L.I.F.E Ministries into a season full of innovative strategic planning. As our culture becomes more and more complacent on sexual depravity, we as Christian Warriors must also respond.

Recently, in my ponderings of how to better serve sexual addicts who muster up enough courage and humility to walk through the door of a sexual addiction support group meeting, the Lord reminded me of my own experience. This is why I’m excited about our new L.I.F.E. Orientation Guide; “The Beginning Journey”.

Remembering my own beginning journey and what it was like when I found an audio lecture or an article that helped minister hope and healing to me about my sexual sin, I began to compile a library of resources I could reflect on as I progressed in recovery. Those articles, books and CD’s became like priceless gems to me in that they helped me gain courage and humility to defeat my pride and denial, and ultimately helped restore my broken relationship with a compassionate and forgiving God.

As a Group Facilitator, I was passionate about having enough of this kind of information to give to a new person who came off the battle field broken, wounded and confused about what was happening in his life. Reaching back into a now vast and diverse collection of articles, devotionals and booklets, I fashioned “welcome packets” for every new person who decided to come to my meetings. It was important to me that these wounded souls could perhaps take home a small “nugget” of hope.

Through time the packet evolved into an educational asset. Many of these wounded souls had spouses, family or loved ones who had questions about sexual addiction and we added intuitive material that helped to “jump start” their understanding of the many “facets” of our addiction, and how all this came to be and what the road to recovery looked like from our perspective at the “starting line”.

The Beginning Journey is a collection of thoughts, articles and concepts that Group Facilitators will find useful in preparing a new member for the journey into the L.I.F.E. Guide and the format of your meeting. Much of this material has been said in other places by other people, but I think that we can all agree that redundancy in recovery is a good thing.

The intent is to provide an integration or orientation tool that will challenge new group members to answer some basic, honest and realistic questions about themselves, their perspective, and their readiness to begin the journey of recovery. The Beginning Journey is divided into a four week, “101” style format. Each new member will be assigned a mentor or temporary sponsor to help answer questions and elaborate on the material. Basic accountability is established in that at the conclusion of each week a challenge is issued by the Guide to the new member that he or she will need to check-in with to the temporary sponsor. The booklet will also provide the Group Facilitator with the opportunity to encourage and share the inclusion process of new members with mature group attendees. This can allow the Principle work of the L.I.F.E. Guide to continue seamlessly for the mainstream of the group.

Finally, and most importantly, the Orientation Guide offers a “no-risk” trial for a new group member who (as I’ve seen so many times before) reaches a reluctance or resistance stage in the early phases of recovery and may pull back or completely quit of the group. This booklet then becomes great “seed” material which can serve as a L.I.F.E. Saver at another time.

The early days, weeks and months of recovery are a delicate and volatile time for addicts, their spouses and families. This integration process can help to resolve some of the “unknowns” that arise. The booklet uses questions to encourage self-reflection and can act as an “internal motive checker”.

The Orientation Guide has been smartly designed to be a modulated tool in that as new concepts, ideas and strategies come forward from people like you, the Group Facilitators, the booklet can be kept fresh, innovative and current with those strategies. We invite you to be prayerful with us in our vision to provide a new ideas and tools to sexual addicts, their spouses, families and to you. May God bless you in your commitment to the lives and wellness of the members of your group, ministry and life.

With Shields Locked,

Larry G.
Order your Orientation Guide today - www.freedomeveryday.org/resources
Comment about this article or the Orientation Guide for Men below.

Connecting at Conference

by Brockwell Bone, Director of Development

The American Association of Christian Counselors hold their World Conference every two years at the Gaylord Opryland Hotel in Nashville, Tennessee. This conference attracts pastors and Christian counselors from across the country, so you can understand the importance of our attendance in September. The L.I.F.E. Ministries booth was located in a prime location that received heavy traffic – and great interest.

The first year that L.I.F.E. attended this event, many people scanned our booth from a distance, quickly diverted their eyes, and walked by very fast. We were the only booth that addressed the issue at the time. Sexual addiction was still an unspoken problem in churches eight years ago. Now, we are one of the most heavily attended booths in the exhibit hall.

This year, rather than a skeleton staff, we had staff and volunteers travel from Florida, Wisconsin, and California to help out at the booth. And the crew was busy! Counselor and pastors would stop and ask questions about the materials, the ministry, and thanked us for the work that L.I.F.E. is doing. In addition, several of our already existing groups came by to share about the fruitful work of their L.I.F.E. support groups.

While there, Bob Hale and I traveled the eight rows of booths and connected with other ministries and organizations that could benefit from our resources. These organizations included residential treatment programs for sexual addiction, ministries for helping pastors with a range of difficulties, and troubled teen programs. We are following up with these contacts to help them integrate L.I.F.E.’s time-tested resources into their existing programs.

Our attendance at AACC’s World Conference creates a strain on the budget every two years as we do not recoup our costs at the conference. But the exposure and awareness pay off in the long run. If you agree that AACC’s World Conference was effective, and you are led to, please consider making a one-time donation to accelerate the recovery of L.I.F.E.’s expenses at www.freedomeveryday.org/aacc or by calling (866) 408-LIFE.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

I Am Fortunate to Have L.I.F.E. (Summer 2007 Newsletter)

Contributed by S.C., Florida


I am so privileged to have a group of women to call friends. I am even more privileged to have a group of women called friends who are safe. And not just safe, but real. They are transparent. They let me be transparent. They let me be me. I can be hurt, I can be happy, I can be angry, I can be all the things God created and intended me to be; and nobody yells at me, dismisses me, or fixes me. They just let me be me, and when I do cry out for help, they offer some of the best insight and wisdom God could provide through sisters. I love these women. I love being able to be with them and not try to fix them....I love practicing (and I need a lot of practice) letting them be themselves and not always trying to offer advice, rather just listening.

I realized about two months after first attending my L.I.F.E. group that I had found a safe place to discuss my issues. It took another month or two for me to realize I had found a home. Who knew it was possible? I certainly didn't think so....I mean, I had spent my life judging others and being fearful of how they were judging me. There were so many masks I wore: different sizes, different shapes, and I could transition from one to the other quite professionally. I certainly didn't discuss feelings - my upbringing trained me well. Feelings just got in the way and prevented me from being successful, appearing educated, professional, and having it all together.

What sad thinking.

I remember the first night I attended a L.I.F.E. group meeting. I was ashamed, scared, disappointed and angry that I had to be there. Don't get me wrong, I chose to be there....but I was angry I had gotten to the point of needing to make the choice. It all makes sense in retrospect, but that night I was far from hopeful. Debbie was the facilitator that night and after making all the introductions, and being welcomed by the group, she said to us, "This is the envelope we pass around. L.I.F.E. Ministries asks for a meaningful contribution each time you attend. Part of our healing is understanding that we are important enough to invest in our own healing and wanting to give back to the ministry that has provided this safe place for us to gather together and create authentic relationships." She went on to say as a first time visitor no contribution was necessary, but to keep it in mind for next week. Strangely enough, in my heart I already wanted to contribute. Deep down, I realized what a fortunate person I was to have a place to go for healing that was already established. I remember thanking God that I lived in a city large enough to have a support group already established and I wondered what it must be like for women who are in small towns with nobody to discuss the pain of addiction. I really WAS grateful I had a place to go where other women had gone before me. Maybe it was because I had prayed for God to send me a mentor, maybe I realized the depth of the uniqueness this group provided. Either way, I was just plain grateful.

Which leads me to the garden. We all know that the ground where we are planting anything must have good soil. We know it must have sunlight and it must have water. Without these elements, what we plant simply dies. As I see it, I am the soil. God provides the sunlight, the water, the seeds; and He has certainly begun breaking up the soil in my heart. I will grow because He loves me enough to provide these things. However, when I participate in His work, it is like I am watering my own yard and I grow so much faster. I join Him in His work, which is reason enough, but I also get the benefits!

REASONS the giving of a meaningful contribution is important to us and the ministry we are benefiting from:

1. We need to invest in our own healing. We must value ourselves as God values us. Making a regular contribution allows us to both physically and emotionally acknowledge our value.
How much more do we appreciate something when we have worked hard and contributed to its success than when something is just given to us?

2. We are privileged to have a group to attend and we want to support the ability for other groups to evolve throughout the world. Only by supporting L.I.F.E. Ministries, saying "Yes, this group helps me!"; and the people who have not only gone before us but have also paved the way for this group, can advancement be accomplished.

3. Years ago, this group would not have existed. The funds are an acknowledgement of the gratitude in my heart to the men and women who broke ground on this addiction. The people who chose to step into the light, struck the first blow into the ground to break up the soil and create a place for the seeds to be planted, watered and grow despite their own shame. I want to honor them and I want the ground to continue being fertile for the heartbroken who are yet to come.

I am truly grateful to no longer be wandering in the desert, praying for water to quench my thirst. God lead me to a place and an organization that participates in what He is doing to heal His children. L.I.F.E. Ministries is actively tilling, planting and watering gardens all over the world. I like to think of God's smile as the sunshine that makes us all stretch and grow towards Him. It is my pleasure to honor Him and my fellow gardeners by contributing each week.

Successful Facilitating: Intake Interview (Summer 2007 Newsletter)

Contributed by Jerry S., Facilitator to multiple L.I.F.E. Groups


When someone wants to enter a L.I.F.E. group, an intake interview is conducted to ensure that the individual is where they need to be, and to familiarize them with how the group works. It is important to make sure the group can meet the needs of the candidate. Established group member welcome newcomers with less hesitation when a candidate comes prepared to take recovery seriously. Participants accept the facilitator's intake Interview as a sort of initiation. Also, the newcomer feels more comfortable taking that initial step through the door to enter their first meeting. Newcomers feel frightened, overwhelmed, and timid. This intake interview can reduce everyone's fears to a manageable level.

During the intake interview, the facilitator should start with their own story. The story should include: First time exposure to porn or other sexual experience, shameful feelings, needing help, finding a L.I.F.E. group, the start of their journey to present day. This will help the newcomer relate to the facilitator by hearing that the facilitator has been where they are now, and the newcomer will gain hope through the facilitator's testimony and time in recovery.

The facilitator can explain the dynamics of the meeting, information about the resources used, and how the meaningful contribution is used each week to help yourself and others. This will give the newcomer insight into the meetings.
During the intake interview, if the newcomer is comfortable, they can share a bit about their addiction. This allows them to open their heart a bit, voice the problem(s), practice being vulnerable and feel a bit of relief even before their first meeting. It also gives the facilitator a chance to guide the newcomer about what is OK and not OK to say in a meeting (i.e. no graphic details, confidentiality, "said here stays here", etc.).

The Intake interview has been a wonderful tool in helping the meetings to remain safe for all participants.

Do you conduct an intake interview similar to this? What other topics do you cover? Share your thoughts now, click Comments below.

_________________________________


Jerry S. is a successful facilitator who facilitates operations of 6 L.I.F.E. Groups including a spouse’s group, organizes retreats, OPEN meetings, one day seminars, marriage seminars and other events for the L.I.F.E. groups in his city.

Updates (Summer 2007 Newsletter)


Upcoming Conference. We are excited to attend the American Association of Christian Counselors World Conference this September! Every two years, this important event gives L.I.F.E. the opportunity to meet thousands of counselors and pastors, and this will be our fourth time there. We were among the first exhibitors to openly address the subject of sexual addiction, and hundreds have visited our dougle booth over the years. Many have expressed their appreciation for the work of L.I.F.E. Ministries during the three previous conferences, and it will be great to see these old friends. While sales of L.I.F.E. Guides at this event have grown each time we’ve attended: getting the issue of sexual addiction and the L.I.F.E. Ministry program in front of these attendees is critical to our growth. There will be about ten of our staff and ministry leaders present to meet and greet the attending pastors and counselors. If you are able and would like to make a financial contribution to help cover the costs (like printing of brochures, preparation of booth, transporation of booth, etc.) of this conference, please call Headquarters at (866) 408-LIFE or visit www.freedomeveryday.org/aacc.

Where are Bob and Johna? They are focused on the upcoming American Association of Christian Counselors World Conference. Their column will appear in the Fall newsletter. Please keep L.I.F.E. in your prayers as we make all the preparations to attend this outreach opportunity.

XXX Church. The crew at XXX Church is successfully entering college campuses and other venues. If you recall, they released a co-branded L.I.F.E. Guide series to offer a tool of recovery along with their awareness efforts. For more information about XXX Church and their message about the destructive nature of pornography, please visit www.xxxchurch.com.

New resources. We are close to releasing two new resources. The first is the Orientation Guide for Men; a booklet designed to effectively educate and integrate newcomers to L.I.F.E. Groups. The second new resource on deck is the L.I.F.E. Guide for Young Women. Look for more information and availability on each of these soon.

Friday, April 13, 2007

Successful Facilitating: Strong Relationships

Contributed by Jerry S., facilitator of multiple L.I.F.E. support groups

Being a growth oriented facilitator involves not only moderating a group each week, but becoming a relational Christian. Strong relationships in the Christian community will develop resources for the facilitator and creates a referral source. Your future members from the community will approach these referral sources needing help with their own sexual integrity.

I recommend developing strong relationships with Christian Counselors, Senior Pastors, Church staff and lay leaders. This may seem difficult to some facilitators, but if God has called you to counsel in addiction, these relationships will only benefit His kingdom.

One may find it easy to meet and introduce themselves over lunch. Pick one day per week and invite a different member of the Christian community to lunch. When calling to invite them, tell them that you facilitate a support group in the area and that you would like to take him or her to lunch. If they hesitate, let them know that you simply want to introduce your ministry and answer any questions without taking up a lot of their time. Make it known that you want to be a "resource" for them...not a burden. During lunch, tell your own story. Share how your own recovery from sexual addiction has brought you to this point and what a support group has meant to you.

Those that you already have contact with or an established relationship with, make yourself available to pray with them about confidential issues. Whether it is for a member of their congregation, a client, themselves, or someone else hurting – offer to be a part of their prayer team. E-Mail them that you just prayed for them or prayed for a specific issue that concerns them. A hand written note has a positive effect.

Keep these relationships informed by providing them with copies of your newsletter, tell them about new resources like the “Sexual Addiction and the Church: Facing the Fire” DVD, and give them access to ministry resources that you already have. Offer to loan out DVD or CD sets that explain more about the ministry to keep them in the know.

If your group hosts open meetings, invite these referral sources so that they may experience what you are doing first hand. They may be reluctant to come, but continue inviting them anyway.

If you have a call to counsel in this ministry, establishing relationships in your local Christian community can impact more lives, create resources for you, and further connect the different ministries in His kingdom.
__________________
Jerry S. is a successful facilitator who facilitates operations of 6 L.I.F.E. Groups including a spouse’s group, organizes retreats, OPEN meetings, one day seminars, marriage seminars and other events for the L.I.F.E. groups in his city.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Alliance Against Pornography

“Jesus Loves Porn Stars!” You may have heard this phrase before from XXX Church. 3X Church is a ministry dedicated to raising awareness about the affects of pornography on God’s people. They travel to churches to speak about the issue of pornography. They setup at adult entertainment trade shows to hand out Bibles with “Jesus Loves Porn Stars!” emblazed on the cover. Craig Gross and his team also conduct debates with Ron Jeremy (long-time adult entertainment industry giant) on college campuses.

L.I.F.E. Ministries and XXX Church have joined forces to further the battle against pornography. Every month, millions of internet pornography sites are visited and with 3X Church’s awareness initiatives and the L.I.F.E. Guide series to combat it, we can remove shame and sexual impurity one addict at a time.

L.I.F.E. Ministries is a Christ-centered support group ministry whose mission is to encourage, empower, and equip God’s people to live everyday in sexual integrity. L.I.F.E. created the L.I.F.E. Guide series of workbooks with editor Dr. Mark Laaser, the foremost Christian expert in sexual addiction recovery.

In April, 3X Church will release its co-branded L.I.F.E. Guides. These guides retain the material of the original guide, but have an introduction from 3X Church and a unique cover to match their ministry’s look. They will take these guides across the country to offer not only awareness of the affects of pornography, but also to give people a tool to combat it.

Please keep 3X Church and L.I.F.E. Ministries in prayer as we both ascend to new levels in our ministries.

(Hit "Comments" below to Blog about this!)

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Exposing Faith Through the XXX Church

by Richard Blankenship
A survey done by Christianity Today magazine found 37 percent of pastors admit to struggling with pornography.

HOLLYWOOD - Two young California pastors say the church isn't facing up to one of the nastiest temptations facing most believers these days, which is pornography. So these men have started up a controversial ministry to take on porn.
Pornography's gone big time. Thirty million people are now logging on to some 300,000 porn Web sites daily.

Craig Gross of xxxchurch.com (Triple X Church) said, "We've talked to people who've lost jobs because they've been looking at it at work. We've talked to people who've gone bankrupt. We've talked to people whose marriages have been destroyed."

With pornography becoming more of a radical problem in society, at least a couple of southern California pastors have decided it needs to be dealt with...radically."

So Mike Foster and Gross started up a web ministry that calls itself "The number one Christian porn site." And they set up booths at America's biggest porn conventions. The purpose? To help people break free from porn.

Foster said, "I think it's time for Christians to be aware of the issues and be pro-active, and not simply let the wave of pornography sweep over us."

And it does hit Christians.

Gross said, "We found that the church and the secular world, there's really no difference in who's struggling." For instance, a survey of men at a Promise Keepers rally showed half had looked at porn in the week just before the rally.

"For so long it kind of was the dirty little secret," Gross continued.. "The church really wanted to pretend and hoped that this thing just goes away."

But a survey done by Christianity Today magazine found 37 percent of pastors admit to struggling with pornography.

Gross said, "And that's why I think they don't want to talk about it amongst the congregations, because it's something they're personally struggling with."

One way to fight back is the xxxchurch.com, a web address deliberately picked to lure porn-seekers who type in the letters "XXX."

"And if you are personally struggling, go to this site, and you are going to realize, you're not alone, that there are other people out there struggling with the same things," said Gross. "We have sections for wives, sections for parents, sections for teenagers. One of them is a prayer wall where you can post your prayers and read about how porn is really affecting others. We have an 800 number where you can call in."

Another freebie that xxxchurch.com offers is "accountability software" that shoots off a biweekly list of web sites you've been visiting to two people of your choosing.

Gross says, "It takes away the secrecy, and a lot of the problems that people have on-line, if you're willing to let someone else see what you see."

The other major purpose of xxxchurch is to let porn industry professionals know Jesus loves them. Gross and Foster have been to several porn conventions, accompanied by their mascot Rex the Rabbit, their answer to the Playboy Bunny.

At these porn shows, they pass out postcards that say "Jesus loves porn stars." And it is this outreach that has caused outrage in some Christian circles.

Foster said, "We have people going 'how do you go to a porn show and keep your purity and, ya know, keep from falling into it?' And the reality is, we're just two guys going to a place where Jesus would be. The church, for the most part, thinks people are going to come to us. That's not the reality of the situation. We have to go to them."

It was at one such convention that Gross and Foster first crossed paths with "Jimmy D" DiGiorgio, an actual porn director.

DiGiorgio said, "I've probably directed in excess of a hundred adult movies." Jimmy D sat in his booth for three days observing the pastors in theirs. "And I can't for the life of me figure out what they're all about," said DiGiorgio. "I saw 'xxxchurch, number one Christian porn site. Finally I got up and walked across the way and sat down and spoke with them for awhile, and I found out they were like missionaries in a sense, coming to the porn convention. 'Oh, I get it. You guys are like Jesus walking with the lepers.'"

Just on a lark, this director of such porn flicks as "Lesbian Talent Scouts" offered to shoot, without charge, a commercial for the pastors.

DiGiorgio said, "'You're probably not going to accept this offer,' and they said, 'Why wouldn't we? You're going to shoot it for free!'"

The team decided to aim the ad at kids, because they are getting hit with porn at younger and younger ages - the average age when they first see it is now 11.

Part of the commercial read, "Have you come across a bunch of magazines in your dad's closet that show pictures of lots of naked mommies? Did it make you feel kind of yucky?" The ad was done, the friendship cemented.

"They're great guys and they're actually fun to hang out with," commented DiGiorgio.

Foster said, "The reality is the porn industry, for the most part, are nice people who are just normal people just like church people, just like me and Craig, and we've actually struck up some great relationships with them."

Meanwhile, the pastors just go on being outrageous. They decided to turn their car into one huge billboard for xxxchurch.com, much to the dismay of quite a few churchgoers.

"We've actually been to a couple of churches where they've actually called the police on us because they were scared of the car," said Foster.

DiGiorgio remarked, "They take a lot of heat for what they do. They're also quite outrageous in their approach to it. They have that Barnum and Bailey kind of thing going for them."

But does any of this work? Have they seen any fruit from this at all?

Foster said, "Well, actually one of the fruits is standing right there. We spent a lot of time talking about Jesus, talking about Jimmy, and where his relationship is at with the Lord."

When asked if the pastors were getting through to him, DiGiorgio replied, "I'm sure that you and your viewers would love to have me say 'yes.' But unfortunately, 'no. I feel the faith that they have, okay, if you will, I sense that about them. I can feel it. It's a real thing. It's almost a tangible thing. Has it become contagious to me? I have to answer 'no.'"

Foster admits Gross and he are not seeing any converts to Christ yet in the porn industry, but they're belligerently optimistic.


Foster said, "And so it's a tough ground that we're planting seeds on, but I really think, with God's power, we're going to see a lot of great fruit come from that."

The web site's been much more successful. More than 50 million hits so far. Many believers back the pastors' efforts, but says Foster, "...then there's the other side of the church that thinks we're complete nut-zos, and we're doing the work of the devil."

But Gross says the church needs to get the log out of its own eye before judging others. He said, "For Christians, our message is really clean up your lives, because we think porn and sin keeps you from doing the work that God wants you to be doing."

Monday, February 12, 2007

I believe in L.I.F.E. ... do you?!

Good Morning:

Starting this year, my business (Bone Endustries) will donate 10% of its profits to charitable organizations each month. This month, I selected Man in the Mirrior, an outreach ministry geared toward men, and L.I.F.E. Ministries.

While I contribute my time and efforts to L.I.F.E., I believe in L.I.F.E.'s mission enough to also contribute financially!

If L.I.F.E. has helped you, someone you know, or, if you are like me, and support the mission - make a contribution today.

In His Service,
Brockwell Bone
Director of Development
L.I.F.E. Ministries
bbone@freedomeveryday.org